A grandmother who raised her children during the Great Depression of the 1930s lived by a stringent mantra: Use it up, wear it out, make it do or do without.
She did that with strings and plastic bags, but also with her car, keeping it for nearly twenty years. She invested herself in her hobbies, crafting quilts from old shirts, sheets, and hand-me-downs. Her friends were the same, hers for life, even when she railed at their mistreatment of her.
What does God want us to hang on to even when we feel its worth has faded? It’s reached its “sell by” date, and we’re ready to move on to something better.
We can get a good glimpse of God’s viewpoint in Malachi 2:16.
“For the man who does not love his wife but divorces her, says the Lord, the God of Israel, covers his garment with violence, says the Lord of hosts. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and do not be faithless.”
“Ouch,” our modern society says. “That’s harsh. Sometimes we have no choice but to move on. When the love is gone …”
Here’s the thing. We’ve come to believe that love and passion equate to the same thing. If we love someone, we must feel emotionally connected to them.
Jesus said we are to love our enemies. He’s saying we are to treat them well, interact with consideration, and use kindness in our entreaties.
That’s the love we read of in Malachi 2:16, treating someone well, being considerate, and taking the kind route even when the emotions fade.
Use it up. We must make our marriage work if possible.
Wear it out. Our spouse should begin to fit like an old shoe, comfortable and with relaxed expectations.
Make it do. Look for the good in your spouse, not for ways they don’t match your ideal.
Or do without. Divorce hurts everyone. It deals with the problem but only in the most selfish way.
God wants the best for us. When we take his advice, everyone wins.
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